Luling couple’s 65th is marked by their ‘Hall of Frames’

Their secret to long marriage isn’t a secret – love, trust, family

Amid the green peppers, eggplant and cucumbers growing in the Howes’ backyard garden is the secret to their success of reaching their 65th wedding anniversary on Friday (July 8).

This Luling couple has lovingly cultivated their relationship for years with the same care and devotion as their prized garden, and its bounty is displayed in their “Hall of Frames” of their five children, 11 grandchildren and 15 great-grandchildren hanging on their walls.

They’ll have to make room for two more great-grandchild photos soon.

And they eagerly share their secret of longevity and life.“I think you believe in the good Lord first and be true to your wife, and never argue and then to bed,” said Joe Howes, 86. “Settle it before you go to bed.”

To Peggy Howes, 83, the secret to a happy marriage is a formula of “One day at a time … love and understanding. Trust one another, as well as understanding each other, and trying to make each other happy.”

Joe added he likes to help with shelling the butter beans and help cook them, too. He also helps put up jars of vegetables.

“I like to grow it and I like to eat it, too,” he said. “I love a good tomato salad.”

Their love for each other is abundantly evident in how much they appreciate each other.

“She’s got to be an angel to have put up with me all these years,” Joe said. “She is very easy going, and she will stop and think stuff out. She’s a very good seamstress.”Three of their five children are daughters, and Peggy made them dresses for school, as well as their wedding dresses, he said.

Asked about Joe, Peggy said, “I think he’s very considerate … very loving.”

Their daughter, Regina Allemand, added from her observation, “It’s a lot of give and take. My mom always has let my dad be the man of the house and my dad always treats my mom like a lady.”

While they may not always agree, Allemand said it is readily apparent they respect each other.

Joe recalls how they met.

“Me and a friend of mine needed a date,” he said. “We went to her house and I asked for a date and she said, ‘Yes.’ I looked around and saw the neighbor’s kids and she told me they were her brothers and sisters. She came from a family of 11.”

Peggy and her family moved to Ponchatoula from Chackbay. She couldn’t speak English – only French at the time.

Farm life was a good one to Joe.

“We had hogs and used lard at that time,” he said. “My mother made light bread (four big loaves in a pan) and you put a little bit of butter and sugar on that bread and had it with a cup of coffee.”

All in all, Joe considered it a good time to grow up.“We were poor, but nobody knew it,” he said. “We always had something to eat.”

But there was one situation Joe recounted about why he keeps an “I believe in Santa Claus” sign on his wall. As a child, he told his mother that he didn’t believe in the Easter rabbit and he didn’t get anything that year. So, now, the sign stays on the wall and reading the letter “Virginia, there is a Santa Claus” became a yearly ritual.

“I still believe there’s a Santa Claus,” he said chuckling. “When I didn’t get nothing for Easter that year, it made my mind up.”

By the time Joe entered the service with the U.S. Coast Guard, they were an item and he asked her to marry him and, again, she said, “Yes.” They spent three years in Texas in the service until he left in 1953. With his mind set on becoming a farmer, they returned to Ponchatoula where they both were raised.

He farmed about a year until he decided it was time to pursue a job to support his family.

Peggy considered it one of the transformational moments in their marriage, which she interpreted as helping to get their family growing, helping to raise the children and “doing the right things.”

Joe found one with Monsanto in Luling and stayed there 22 years until he retired. But he decided he wasn’t ready for retirement so he got a job with another chemical plant in the area and worked in that industry until he retired again in 1995.

Looking back, Joe said without hesitation, “I’d do it all over again with my wife.”

Peggy added, “I think it’s very rewarding now that you see your family growing and have the love of your family, and get to see your great grandchildren. It’s great.”