Lifelong St. Charles Parish resident Carla Langley’s mother died while Carla was pregnant with her own daughter, Anna McDuffy. Anna is now a senior at Destrehan, and on a sunny Sunday in November, her and her mother walked St. Charles Borromeo cemetery, visiting the ancestors the LSU-bound teen never got to meet.
“It’s part of our history, it’s where we came from,” Langley said.
Such is the Catholic tradition of All Souls Day, a ritual where loved ones offer prayers for the dead on Nov. 2 and throughout the month. The living offer prayers to those departed who reside in purgatory, and appeal for the deceased’s ascension into heaven. The day prior, commonly referred to as All Saints Day, sees prayers offered to those who have found their way into heaven.
It is on this day that many, such as Langley, choose to visit the dearly departed in their final resting place, sharing stories and leaving momentos.
In St. Charles Borromeo, this includes relatives whose lives stretch into the 19th century.
Langley points out a grave surrounded by an old wrought iron fence in the old part of the cemetery, occupied by Louise and Layous Gassen. She told the story of Layous, a clerk for the St. Charles Parish government in its early days, buying one of the “old arpent” lots almost directly across the river from the cemetery in the 19th century. This land ownership, she said, was part of the reason why Louise, who Langley said was the daughter of a New Orleans banana importer named Benedetto, could marry Layous. Layous, she said, was not “land poor.”
“It’s not like you can talk about your family history in your normal day routine,” Langley said. “This event offers me an opportunity to explain to [McDuffy] some really cool, interesting things about our ancestry.”
Parish President V.J. St. Pierre also took some time to share some of his history with his granddaughter in tow. He said he uses both All Souls Day and All Saints Day to visit with his grandparents, parents and a brother. The brother, he said, was lost at a young age in a car accident that claimed the lives of two others.
“On a beautiful day like this, you kind of reflect on the good times you had with the people you lost…just wishing they were with us now,” he said, his voice lightly cracking.
Sunday was also St. Charles Borromeo Church’s family day, bringing throngs of parishioners of all ages to the lot directly adjacent to the old part of the cemetery.
“When you look around and see a beautiful day like this, it reassures you that there is a God that made this and wants us to enjoy it,” St. Pierre said.
One woman stopped only briefly to leave flowers on a grave. She said she does it every year, before retreating to a running car.
The event, however, seemed to give generations an opportunity to connect and even make light of the very concept of death. Langley said she and her daughter were sitting after visiting her mother’s grave, and got up after her daughter asked where Langley would be buried.
She points out a slot in the lower row of the north-facing end of the mausoleum—she is not sure which spot, exactly, is hers, but she is certain it’s in that area. The location is outside, and rests not too far from the old graves of the Langley ancestors. She and her daughter agree that there’s nothing morbid about talking about death—that it is a fact of life.
“I just hope that, when my times comes, hopefully she will tell wonderful stories about me,” Langley laughs.
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