Sister remembers her brother as compassionate, quick witted
Before his death on March 3, Arthur Wear III, 27, told a friend that he left notes for his sister hidden in her home. Wear was nearing the end of his 11-year battle with Ewing Sarcoma.
Diagnosed at 16 years old, after his freshman year at Hahnville High School, Wear had endured years of cancer treatments, brief remissions and brutal relapses. After days in the ICU fighting septic shock, doctors told him there was no other treatments to try. He had done everything.
So, he went to Disney World, lived life to the fullest, and hid notes for his sister, who was his best friend. He would text her often, “Hey Vic, I love you.”
Victoria Comardelle, Wear’s older sister by three years, found one of the notes in a kitchen drawer.
“I love you, Vic,” the note read. “I put this here to be found after I’m gone to say I’m still here in your hearts. I love all of you. I love all you and Ty have done for me.”
Comardelle said she felt relief when she read the note.
“I know how scared he was because he didn’t want to go,” she said. “Getting that note gave me a little bit of comfort because he knew it was going to be okay.”
Comardelle described Wear as quick witted. He was someone with an infectious smile, goofy jokes and a compassionate spirit. He loved adventure and travel: he made a trip to Iceland. He loved nature trials and camping. And he loved a good crawfish boil. The most important things to him were his family, friends and girlfriend, Juliet.
Wear lived in St. Charles Parish with Comardelle, her husband Ty, and their two children for the last four years. It was precious time.
“We would watch TV and go ride on the golf cart,” Comardelle said of time spent with her brother. “He loved to shop, and he loved to eat. He always wanted to go out to eat. He would text me, ‘meet me here, let’s go eat.’”
Wear would bring home stuffed animals for his niece. He would share updates about his niece and nephew with friends. He was a proud uncle.
“He loved them so much,” Comardelle said. “He was a fantastic uncle. He was helpful. He would say, ‘Hey, get some extra rest, sleep in, I’ll take care of the kids.’”
Wear’s diagnosis came only after multiple trips to the hospital. He was experiencing terrible stomach pain, but doctors couldn’t find the cause until one scan – that his mother pushed for – found a blood clot. A year later, doctors discovered the clot was on top of a tumor.
“It was scary,” Comardelle said of the diagnosis. “Me and my mom kept researching thing after thing: What can we do? Where can we take him? It was rough.”
Wear was courageous and had a strong will to live, Comardelle said.
“He always lived life to the fullest,” Comardelle said. “Even up until he was on hospice, passing away, he had a strong will to want to keep living. One of his favorite verses is ‘we walk by faith, not by sight.’ Even though he knew his outcome in life, he never let that stray from the type of person that he was.”
In 2018, during his cancer battle, Wear’s mother died suddenly months after his grandmother passed away.
“It was really hard on him,” Comardelle said. “I bought him a bracelet that had their picture in it so he could feel like they were still with him.”
Comardelle’s advice to others is to stand by their loved ones through their cancer journey.
“Cancer is hard,” she said. “Just constantly tell them you love them and that you’re not going to give up on them, because that makes them not want to give up on themselves.”
Comardelle is holding on to the special memories she made with her brother. What stands out the most is their recent trip to Disney World.
“He was like a kid in a candy store,” Comardelle said. “He was so excited. He rode every ride; he closed the parks down. I’m so glad we got to make that trip together.”
